Monday, June 19, 2006

Remind you of anyone?

Hanna and I were sitting on the couch, flipping through the channels when we alighted for a moment on Miss Martha making a sufle or centerpiece or whatever it is she does, and Hanna said, "Does Martha Stewart remind you of anybody?"

I said instantly (since I'd said it before) "Billie," (my step mother) "She even looks like her. They've got the same haircut."

Hanna said "I was about to say she reminded me of Jo..." and then she stopped.

"Oh my God!" she screamed, "Martha Stewart is everybody's step-mother!"

And it made perfect sense. She's somebody you would never get to know her without a good reason. She's polite in an arogant sort of way, stuffy and strained and always knows what's best for everybody. She's infuriating but you really can't get rid of her. And she insists you do stupid things like build fallen leaf centerpieces for the dinner table or drink sake out of cups she carved by hand from a stock of bamboo outside the kitchen window.

Martha is not America's mother, she's America's step-mother. It all makes perfect sense now.


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